The Last Ounce of Love

 

“Everything comes with an expiry date,” as people quote it.

Though it’s true, our belief system waits for an incident to realize. Like my love.

Love ends quite painfully, but the climax is informative and comprehending.

Let me tell you how.

 

“I want to stay like this for eternity,” I spoke, whilst wondering how she could have such emotive and baby cheeks. I was scared to handle those milky cheeks.

“Who is stopping us?” those god damn eyes could speak louder. The confidence and surety was assuring and full of life. I was out of words; felt like the world around took break to watch us. It isn’t even the touch; it’s the promise that kept everything hooked.

Love isn’t drug. Love is known unknowingness. Everything seems to be happening for us, we thank God for taking such a care in writing, but we don’t realize that God is still writing.

On the way, leaving her deems greater than dying. Soon dreams are built on illogical pillars. The path ahead seems clear and filled with enormous amount of joy and understanding. Flaws fade. Heart craves for more “us” time. Molding for one another appears relishing. From promising baselessly to realize its aftermath, things take a halt and vicious turn. And everything after that is Greek.

“God what’s happening?”

Situations which were caressing turn poking. Dreams shatter. The long happy way is no longer commutable. “Were we insane to plan all these?” self questioning isn’t a great help but nails you down to the table of fact. But it’s still the known unknowingness. Truth takes the responsibility of every act.

Years pass, the white blood cells of hope refuse to heal the wound of love.

 

 

 

 

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With Love

                               

Things didn’t go well for past the one month between us, chain of fights kept us apart, ego made us stay distant, though love pulled us together, we got tied ourselves to anchors of anger from the past, memories urged to get back, loneliness begged for company.

Past one month went unhurried, hard, isolated for me, I know it is same there but something made stay this way. Her contact on my phone craved to dial, daily routine of mine looked so unusual. I missed her morning wishes, her care, her voice, long narrations about her day, her giggles and chuckles.

Clock only ticked to remind me of the time she would call, every ring of my phone, beep of message nudged me. Frequent visits to gallery, call recordings, funny videos when we were happy together, aided me to pass this desolated state.

25 August 2018

It is going to be 3^rd year anniversary of our love life, a day after tomorrow, we celebrated our last two anniversaries together and this ate my heart being far this time. So, I decided to travel to her on that day, wish her, ask her apology and turn it into another memorable day.

Got off the train after two hours traveling by it, the eagerness in me made the time move slow, just wanted to turn on the time lapse mode. The place I visited frequently for the past three years appeared to be so odd this time. Every time I stood in this place, she was on the call, knowing my current position, that made me feel new for this time.

Took an auto rickshaw straight to her college, I felt like every one looked at me like that they knew about our fight and I am here to apologize her. The bakery just touching to her college wall, at which we celebrated her birthday, the shopping mall at the city center, to which we went later that day, everything welcomed me again.

A big blue gate in an awkward shape, I guess it’s a flower, wished hello with a creak. Watchman at the entrance gave a familiar smile as I entered into the college. The main way is divided into two, the first one takes to the main block of college, painted in maroon & cream, the second way brought me into the large garden area, with a few trees at an equal interval, a round of cement base constructed around it. I pressed my both palms on the cemented white colored base at the last tree towards the gate, showing my back at it, lifted myself up and managed to sit, from where I can put an eye on the exit way out of college.

An hour passed, eyes worked with perfection, scanned every person went on that way, exactly after ten minutes of time, my clock ticked five, the time she usually calls me, my optic nerve sent the information to the brain that it found a person familiar after so many hours, ‘yes’, confirmed by cerebellum with in no time.

Her long strands of hair came as waves on to her cheeks, she just drove them back with her fingers over the top of her right ear, chains attached to bracelet with diamond shaped ending dangled with the moment of her hand, red shiny dress is so identifiable in that dusk light, her face glowed more. 

I briskly walked in her direction, she took a turn towards me, like someone called her, she noticed me with ease through the students walking between us, her eyes widened, grinning, her mouth opened in shock, which she covered with her hand. She came to me making her way clear, when she is two feet away from me, she paused, I accelerated myself towards her, my both hands in air away from my body, only came to rest when my hands wrapped around her body, I hugged.

“I love you, pappy” I said involuntarily.

 

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